Originally my mother’s, the Question Authority pin is the center of a family joke from my childhood. Ironically or not, it’s also one of our core family values. It has inspired me for years and as I reflected on ways to describe my leadership style, I found that when integrated with kindness, questioning the authority of those above, below, and within us creates opportunities to solve problems that can lift communities.
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“What does that mean?” I asked, pointing at the yellow button on the lapel of my mom’s jean jacket, which at eight years old (in 1988!) was just my height.
“Question Authority,” she read aloud. After a beat she looked me in the eyes and replied, “Well, authority means to be in charge.” I could tell by the way she didn’t break eye contact it was the truth, and yet…
“So it means that you’re the authority on… questions?” I asked, so not getting it.
My mom is a magical human born in 1948, coming of age in a revolutionary time for women, burning her bra and everything. She was at a crossroads, this rebel womanhood biting the ass of her 40 year-old-self as a mother of three kids, all of whom inherited her spark of rebellion. The mother won:
“Yes, it means I have all the answers.” She confirmed with a nod and walked away.
I believed her far longer than I care to admit; however, my family’s value of civil disobedience was not subtle. Nor was the purpose of that disobedience: to lift others. The button has since been a long running joke in our family, a symbol of my naïveté and my mother’s wit. She gave it to me for Christmas last year and I realized how often I have used its advice in my career.
Leaders use the approach of questioning authority by inquiring about their boss’s dreams, goals, and intentions. Many call this sucking up. Good leaders, though, align their team with these bigger goals in mind. They use the answers to interpret the goals and expectations set upon them and determine a strategy for how the team can contribute to the intentions of the work. Great leaders integrate kindness, questioning ideas or methods to push stakeholders to think deeper, reinforcing intentions and outcomes, while finding commonalities in order to create change.
Leaders ask questions of those over whom they have authority: Why did they choose this job? What are their career goals? Good leaders ask their team about their own effectiveness as leaders. They brace themselves for the answers then listen and have the integrity to change, or to remain on course. Great leaders use the answers to individually align expectations and goals to create self-motivated accountability in their employees. As a result staff understand their leader makes collaborative, team-oriented decisions, especially when facing challenges, thus consistently putting their best work forth.
Leaders question their own authority. Why was I put in this role? What do I bring to the table that my team does not? Good leaders ask themselves their intentions and measure their actions. They understand they are not leaders because they are superior, but because they have a different skill set than those they lead. Great leaders know that their authority is precious and powerful, vulnerable and valuable. They handle it with grace, humility, and gratitude, lifting communities as they rise.
One of most important authorities you as a leader must question is the authority you have over yourself. You have the authority to make your own decisions, set your own boundaries, follow your own dreams. Are you balancing your career goals and the daily grind? How are you approaching the challenges you face? Are you using your power to bring people together? Are you spending your time how you wish? Are you honoring your authority? Or is it time to question and reset course?
Some of these questions may be easy to ask, some quite difficult. Don’t worry, the answers are not as important as the act of thinking about them.
And if you really need an answer, I’ll just ask my mom.
Ms. Coaching 